Divorce Help 101
Custody
Child custody, without an agreement between the parties, is generally one of the most likely areas for dispute in any Family Court case. Not that people take their children for granted, actually quite usually the opposite. However parents that have lived together through the entirety of their marriage are accustom to having their children available to them whenever and usually wherever they want. People can go out and buy a new television, car or even a house, but children can not be replaced and can only be one place at any one time. This is what makes child custody so difficult.
In fact, it is not unusual to have horrible custody battles develop in the family courts. Across the country there is generally one guiding principal the family courts use to decide the issue of custody and this is what is knows as “the best interest” of the child or children. While the concept is quite basic it is frequently quite difficult to quantify or sometimes define and must frequently be decided on a case-by-case basis. It is not unusual for each party to be completely convinced that it is in the best interest of their child or children to be with them and for the other parent to have only visitation; however, as I said above, as children can not be in two places at the same time, one parent must necessarily receive less time with their children than the other.
Each case must be addressed separately with particular attention being given to the facts of the specific case. Often it is necessary to have a third party known as a Guardian ad Litem involved to investigate what is really best for the children. This individual may or may not be an attorney but will usually have basic training in the area of custody issues. This individual will meet the children and the parties to better be able to issue a report to the Court. In some states this individual may even make recommendations to the Court on the issue of custody. In other states the Guardians can only make reports to the Court and are not allowed to make recommendations to the Court.
In the area of custody, there are a number of options for the specific type of custodial arrangement that may be put into place either by the Court or by agreement. Typically the custodial arrangement embodies a combination of two basic concepts. These concepts, legal custody and physical custody make up the foundation for essentially every custodial arrangement.
Legal custody determines which parent, or in conjunction, how both of the parents make decisions concerning what will be done in regards to the children’s health, education and welfare. The possibilities run from one parent being able to make all decisions for the child or children without even consulting the other parent to the other extreme where no decision can be made without the joint input and consent of both parties.
Physical custody determines where the children actually will be located at any particular time. The extremes run from one parent having sole custody with the other parent having minimal visitation – usually every other weekend, holidays and some time in the summer to the parents having essentially equal time with the children.
Different kinds of custody include sole custody or joint custody and variations of each. However, every custodial arrangement will include some blend of legal and physical custody of the children.
There is no one prevailing factor that will automatically determine custody; however, both parents must be fit and there must be no threat of harm or actual harm to the children from either. However, if there is a threat of harm or even if there has been abuse of the children, this does not mean that the offending spouse will never be able to see their children. There are options for restricted or supervised visitation as well as the chance of reunification once the threat of harm or the harm has been addressed.
All too often people think that they can keep their children from their other spouse simply because they want to; however, it is extremely rare for this to happen and when it does happen it is almost always possible for the problem to be cured. In fact if one party attempts to keep their children from their spouse, it can actually come back to cause problems with their future relationship with their children – perhaps even causing them to lose custody.
Overall, custody is a very difficult subject area that must be carefully considered. There is no one simple answer to the task of determining custody except to say that the more parties can agree upon in regards to the children the more likely the issue will be resolved sooner with as little negative impact to the children who are the most important part of the equation.
Keep in mind that while property from a marriage will be divided and each party will usually be completely financially separated and free from involvement with their ex-spouse, if children are involved, generally until the children are 18 the parents will have to be involved. This results in a situation where the more parents can agree the better their relationship will be in the future.
Disclaimer
In fact, it is not unusual to have horrible custody battles develop in the family courts. Across the country there is generally one guiding principal the family courts use to decide the issue of custody and this is what is knows as “the best interest” of the child or children. While the concept is quite basic it is frequently quite difficult to quantify or sometimes define and must frequently be decided on a case-by-case basis. It is not unusual for each party to be completely convinced that it is in the best interest of their child or children to be with them and for the other parent to have only visitation; however, as I said above, as children can not be in two places at the same time, one parent must necessarily receive less time with their children than the other.
Each case must be addressed separately with particular attention being given to the facts of the specific case. Often it is necessary to have a third party known as a Guardian ad Litem involved to investigate what is really best for the children. This individual may or may not be an attorney but will usually have basic training in the area of custody issues. This individual will meet the children and the parties to better be able to issue a report to the Court. In some states this individual may even make recommendations to the Court on the issue of custody. In other states the Guardians can only make reports to the Court and are not allowed to make recommendations to the Court.
In the area of custody, there are a number of options for the specific type of custodial arrangement that may be put into place either by the Court or by agreement. Typically the custodial arrangement embodies a combination of two basic concepts. These concepts, legal custody and physical custody make up the foundation for essentially every custodial arrangement.
Legal custody determines which parent, or in conjunction, how both of the parents make decisions concerning what will be done in regards to the children’s health, education and welfare. The possibilities run from one parent being able to make all decisions for the child or children without even consulting the other parent to the other extreme where no decision can be made without the joint input and consent of both parties.
Physical custody determines where the children actually will be located at any particular time. The extremes run from one parent having sole custody with the other parent having minimal visitation – usually every other weekend, holidays and some time in the summer to the parents having essentially equal time with the children.
Different kinds of custody include sole custody or joint custody and variations of each. However, every custodial arrangement will include some blend of legal and physical custody of the children.
There is no one prevailing factor that will automatically determine custody; however, both parents must be fit and there must be no threat of harm or actual harm to the children from either. However, if there is a threat of harm or even if there has been abuse of the children, this does not mean that the offending spouse will never be able to see their children. There are options for restricted or supervised visitation as well as the chance of reunification once the threat of harm or the harm has been addressed.
All too often people think that they can keep their children from their other spouse simply because they want to; however, it is extremely rare for this to happen and when it does happen it is almost always possible for the problem to be cured. In fact if one party attempts to keep their children from their spouse, it can actually come back to cause problems with their future relationship with their children – perhaps even causing them to lose custody.
Overall, custody is a very difficult subject area that must be carefully considered. There is no one simple answer to the task of determining custody except to say that the more parties can agree upon in regards to the children the more likely the issue will be resolved sooner with as little negative impact to the children who are the most important part of the equation.
Keep in mind that while property from a marriage will be divided and each party will usually be completely financially separated and free from involvement with their ex-spouse, if children are involved, generally until the children are 18 the parents will have to be involved. This results in a situation where the more parents can agree the better their relationship will be in the future.
Disclaimer
